For those who know me, they know that words (very) rarely
fail me. Yet, after the death of one of my best and dearest friends today, I
find myself at a sustainable loss for my “weapon” of choice. There is no
vernacular sufficient enough. No expanded vocabulary that will do Jonathan
Vela, San Antonio’s Aquaman, proper justice. Yet, I am going to make a futile
attempt to immortalize some things about him in print; in remembrance of a
superior soul that deserves nothing less than that.
In the five years I knew Jonathan, three of those were spent
quite close to him. And in that short time, he taught me five life lessons that
I could have only learned adequately from a man who this entire city became to
affectionately know…as Aquaman.
#1: Be
Unapologetically Yourself…Always
It didn’t matter to Jonathan when people would make fun of a
thirty-something year old man who wanted to become Aquaman one day. It didn’t
bother him one bit. He loved being Aquaman. He loved who he was, and he did it
unapologetically, because those who mind, don’t matter, and those who matter,
don’t mind. I often used to love to tease him about his alter-ego, nearly as
much as he has enjoyed teasing me about mine. Nevertheless, he taught me that
being happy in your own skin, being unapologetically yourself, no matter who
that is, is one singular key to happiness in an otherwise dreary world.
#2: Love, Love More
and Love With All of Your Heart
Jonathan and I had a long standing, “I love you more”
argument. I lost count of how many Facebook messages, text messages and wall
posts there have been. But I don’t need to count them. Jonathan taught me the
value of saying, “I love you” to those who matter most, and saying it often,
even if it was an argument that no one ever really “lost”. In a gentle way that
only Jonathan could have done, he began softening a heart in me that had long
since become hardened and battle scarred by life in general. To him, for this,
I will be eternally grateful, but I know I am not the only one he gave this
gift to. He gave it thousands more. Something very few people can truly boast
in life, or after.
That was just who he was. He loved, loved, and loved more…with
all of his heart, no matter what. He never gave up on anyone, never turned his
back, never passed judgment. He just loved. And, in return, he was loved. A
lesson many of us need to learn, myself included.
#3: When Words Fail,
AYSD Will Do
It always brought a smile to my face when someone would
question a phrase he and I often used on our social media banter. At some point
in the conversation, one of us would say, “AYSD”. And we never told anyone what
that meant. It was our secret. But, what it meant was, “Anything you say dear.”
And that was our way of saying, “I don’t agree with you, but I love you anyway,”
or (much more often) just us two enjoying our very outside, but inside joke on
the rest of the world. He taught me that winning isn’t always “winning”. That
sometimes when you win, you lose. And, from that lesson, AYSD was born and
retooled often.
#4: Raise Your
Actions, Raise Your Words, Not Your Temper or Your Voice, and Find Your
Superpower
To anyone who would question whether or not Jonathan Vela
was a superhero, I would ask you one question: Do you have the power to light
up the faces in every room you walk into? If you don’t, know that he did. That
was one of his most amazing superpowers. He could, and would (every chance he
got) make people happy. He never believed in drama. He never participated in
it. He was too busy embracing the flavor of life, and choosing to be happy.
Something I had hoped he would be around to teach me a little better to do in
the years ahead, but something I am committing to work on, in his memory.
#5: Beautifully
Broken Pieces, When Put Together, Create Something Even More Beautiful
Perhaps the most poignant lesson Jonathan taught me, was
that we are all beautifully broken, flawed creatures. But, when we find the
pieces of our broken souls that match up with other broken souls out there, the
mosaic that we can create is magical. Because with enough time, and love and
care, anything broken can be put back together and made into nothing less than
a masterpiece. And he, over time, was a masterpiece all his own.
Jonathan Vela was a true super hero, in every sense of the
word, and he always be. Maybe asleep for now, but never forgotten….because only
a super hero can change hearts, can transform minds and ignite a spark that
lights the world. And, that’s exactly what he did. And that is exactly what his
memory will always do. If nothing else, I can find solace in knowing that
heaven is no longer short one true superhero; and that superhero is now looking
over all of us, in a way that only a superhero in heaven can do.
Beautiful tribute for a beautiful soul. Great piece Shauna.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful Thank you for sharing
ReplyDeleteAloha `oe
ReplyDeleteA hui hou kakou Johnathan
Aloha
In Hawaiian...Farewell to you, until we meet again Johnathan , with respect and love from all.
Shauna, Your words are your superpower. Beautifully written.
ReplyDeleteAlex C